PanicStation.org
UK USA
uk Sexual violence & highly sensitive situations client sent sexual messages • customer sent sexual texts • sexual messages from client • inappropriate client messages • sexual harassment by customer • third party harassment at work • sexually suggestive emails • unwanted flirting from client • boundary setting with clients • worried about job impact • complaint about client behaviour • sexual comments in work chat • uncomfortable client communication • client crossing professional lines • manager support for harassment • workplace safety from customers • repeated unwanted messages • escalating client behaviour • fear of retaliation at work • evidence of unwanted messages

What to do if…
a client or customer sends sexual messages and you worry it could affect your work

Short answer

Stop engaging in that channel, save the messages, and tell your manager/HR as soon as you safely can so your workplace can take over contact and protect you.

Do not do these things

  • Do not reply emotionally, apologise, negotiate, flirt back, or “keep it friendly” to smooth things over.
  • Do not delete messages, screenshots, chat logs, voicemails, or call records.
  • Do not switch the conversation to personal accounts, private messaging apps, or off-the-clock calls.
  • Do not agree to meet them alone, “to clear the air,” or accept gifts/favours.
  • Do not assume you have to tolerate it because they are a paying client/customer.
  • Do not confront them in person if you feel unsafe or cornered.

What to do now

  1. Create a brief safety pause. If you’re at work and feel shaken, step away to a private space (toilet, staff room, quiet corridor) and take 60 seconds to steady your breathing before doing anything else.
  2. Preserve what happened (lightly, without overdoing it).
    • Take screenshots of the messages (include names/handles and timestamps).
    • Save the full thread and any attachments.
    • Write a short note: date/time, platform, what was said, whether you replied, and whether this is the first time.
  3. Stop direct contact in the same channel.
    • If your role allows it, do not respond further and mute the conversation.
    • If you must send something to protect boundaries, send one neutral line only, e.g. “Please keep communications professional and work-related,” then stop.
  4. Move communication onto safer, trackable work systems. If contact must continue for business reasons, use only official channels (work email/ticketing/CRM) and avoid private messaging or personal numbers.
  5. Tell the right person at work, early.
    • Report to your manager and/or HR (or the designated reporting route in your policy).
    • If you’re in a small business, tell the owner/most senior person.
    • Ask for a clear plan today: who takes over contact, what to say to the client/customer, and how you’re protected.
  6. Name the issue plainly and ask for workplace action. In the UK, employers have a legal duty to take reasonable steps to prevent sexual harassment at work, including from customers/clients. Reporting is often what triggers immediate protections.
  7. Ask for immediate practical protections. Examples:
    • Another colleague handles that account/customer.
    • Any meetings are cancelled, moved online, or done with a second staff member present.
    • Your phone number is removed from signatures/records; communications are routed via a shared inbox.
    • Access controls are tightened if they have your direct details.
  8. If there is any threat, stalking, doxxing, or you feel unsafe, treat it as a safety issue (not just “work drama”).
    • Tell a manager immediately and ask not to be left alone with them.
    • If you are in immediate danger, call 999. If not immediate but concerning, you can contact 101 for police advice.
  9. Keep a simple ongoing log. If messages continue, add date/time/platform and what happened. Keep it factual and short.

What can wait

  • You do not need to decide right now whether to make a formal grievance, start legal action, or “prove” it meets a specific legal threshold.
  • You do not need to write a perfect statement today — saving the messages and making an initial report is enough.
  • You do not need to keep serving the client/customer personally while you “figure it out.”

Important reassurance

It’s common to freeze, overthink, or worry you’ll be blamed for “upsetting a client.” This is not your fault. You’re allowed to protect your boundaries and ask your workplace to prevent you being put back in the same situation.

Scope note

These are first steps to stabilise the situation, reduce risk, and hand it to the right workplace process. Longer-term decisions (formal complaints, legal options, role changes) can come later with support.

Important note

This is general information, not legal advice. If you’re unsure what to do in your workplace, you can seek confidential employment advice and, if you feel at risk, prioritise immediate safety and professional support.

Additional Resources
Support us