What to do if…
an interviewer or recruiter asks sexual questions that feel unrelated to the role
Short answer
Stop the interview as soon as you can and get yourself to a calmer, safer pause. You do not have to answer sexual questions to “keep the opportunity”.
Do not do these things
- Do not feel you must “play along” or answer to avoid seeming difficult.
- Do not hand over extra personal details (address, socials, relationship info) to “smooth it over”.
- Do not keep arguing in the moment if you feel pressured or unsafe — your priority is to exit cleanly.
- Do not delete messages or call logs right now (it can remove useful context later).
- Do not post identifying details publicly while you’re still shaken (it can escalate contact or affect evidence).
What to do now
- Create a safe pause. If you’re in person, end the meeting and leave (go to a public area or somewhere you feel safe). If it’s a call/video, end the call.
- Use a short boundary line (one sentence), then act. For example:
- “I’m not comfortable with that question — it’s not relevant to the role. Let’s stick to the job requirements.”
- If it continues: “I’m going to end the interview now.”
- Write a quick private record while it’s fresh (2–5 minutes). Note the date/time, company/agency, names, what was asked (approximate wording), and anyone who witnessed it. If it was written (email/chat), save screenshots.
- Put it in writing to the organisation (keeps your options open).
- Email the company/agency saying you’re following up because you were asked sexual/personal questions unrelated to the role, and you want it logged. Keep it short. Keep a copy.
- Choose one immediate “external” route (optional).
- If it was an agency recruiter: ask for a manager/complaints contact; request confirmation they’ve opened a complaint and ask what safeguarding steps they’ll take (for example, removing you from contact with that recruiter).
- If it was a direct employer interview: contact HR or the hiring lead, ask for a different interviewer, and request confirmation the concern is recorded.
- If you feel at risk of ongoing contact: switch communications to email (so there’s a clear record). If they contact you on personal channels and it feels unsafe or harassing, consider blocking after saving the messages.
- If there were threats, stalking, or unwanted sexual touching: prioritise safety. You can consider contacting the police. If you’re unsure what to do next, speaking to specialist support or advice first can help you decide.
What can wait
- You do not have to decide today whether to make a formal legal claim or report to any regulator.
- You do not have to confront the person again to “get an apology” or “prove” what happened.
- You do not have to decide whether to continue with the application right now — stabilise first.
Important reassurance
Being shaken, confused, or “second-guessing” yourself is a common reaction when someone crosses boundaries in a professional setting. You’re allowed to stop the interaction and you’re allowed to protect your privacy.
Scope note
This is first-steps-only guidance to help you stabilise, preserve options, and reduce harm. If you choose to take it further, you may want specialist employment or harassment support.
Important note
This guide is general information, not legal advice. Processes and rights can vary by nation within the UK and by the specifics of what happened; if you want to take action, getting tailored advice can help.
Additional Resources
- https://www.acas.org.uk/sexual-harassment
- https://www.acas.org.uk/discrimination-and-the-law/harassment
- https://www.acas.org.uk/if-an-employer-says-you-cannot-apply-or-rejects-you-for-a-job/checking-if-you-were-discriminated
- https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/work/discrimination-at-work/dealing-with-discrimination-at-work/checking-if-its-discrimination/if-you-think-youve-been-unfairly-treated-when-applying-for-a-job/
- https://www.equalityhumanrights.com/guidance/sexual-harassment-and-harassment-work-technical-guidance