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uk Sexual violence & highly sensitive situations

What to do if…
someone in authority implies work or another opportunity depends on sexual attention or favours

Produced and maintained by PanicStation.org Published: Last reviewed: Editorial policy UK guide

Short answer

Get to a place where you are not alone with the person, and contact someone you trust. You do not need to answer, agree, confront them, give up the opportunity or decide about reporting while you are under pressure.

Do not do these things

  • Do not stay alone with the person if you feel unsafe, trapped or unable to leave freely.
  • Do not feel that you must answer, explain yourself or challenge the implication immediately.
  • Do not confront them alone or arrange another private meeting to test what they meant.
  • Do not rely on them for transport, accommodation or access to safety if that would increase their control.
  • Do not resign, withdraw from the opportunity or make a public statement while panicked unless leaving is necessary for immediate safety.
  • Do not let anyone pressure you either to report or to remain silent.

What to do now

  1. Create a safer pause. Move to a public or shared place, leave the meeting, end the call or ask another person to join you. Call 999 if you or someone else is in immediate danger.
  2. Use the smallest response that helps you leave safely. You can say that you need to go, end the conversation or not reply; you do not have to challenge the person in the moment.
  3. Tell one trusted person what happened and where you are. Ask them to stay with you, call you, collect you or be present during any necessary contact.
  4. If it feels safe and useful, keep the original messages and make a brief dated note of what was said, when, where and who was present; do not contact the person to obtain more material.
  5. Reduce one-to-one access. Keep necessary contact in writing where possible, ask for another person to attend meetings or request a different contact.
  6. Choose an independent contact who is not controlled by the person involved. At work in England, Scotland or Wales, this may be a manager outside their reporting line, HR, a trade union representative or Acas. In Northern Ireland, it may be a manager or HR contact, a trade union representative, the Labour Relations Agency or the Equality Commission for Northern Ireland. Elsewhere, it may be a safeguarding contact, complaints contact or professional body.
  7. Contact a specialist sexual violence support service for confidential support with your immediate safety and choices. You can seek support without first deciding whether to make a formal complaint or contact the police.
  8. If you are under 18, tell a trusted adult or safeguarding lead who is not connected to the person, or contact Childline directly.

What can wait

  • Deciding whether to continue with the job, project, course, audition or opportunity.
  • Deciding today whether to make a formal workplace, professional or institutional complaint.
  • Deciding whether to contact the police.
  • Writing a perfect or complete account of what happened.
  • Choosing the exact label for the person’s behaviour.
  • Confronting the person or asking them to admit what they meant.
  • Making a permanent career, financial or public decision.

Important reassurance

You did not cause this by seeking work, support, mentoring or an opportunity. Freezing, delaying, changing the subject, laughing nervously or acting as though you did not understand does not mean that you agreed. You are allowed to protect your safety and take time before choosing what happens next.

Scope note

This guide covers immediate safety, support and practical first steps only. Later decisions about complaints, employment, safeguarding, police contact or legal action may require specialist help.

Important note

This is general information, not legal, employment, medical, safeguarding, therapeutic or other professional advice. It cannot determine whether particular conduct is unlawful or which formal route is appropriate in your circumstances.

Additional Resources

Closely connected guides that may be useful during the same situation or its immediate aftermath.

About this guide

This guide was produced and is maintained by PanicStation.org using its published editorial process. Official and specialist sources are checked where relevant, and AI-assisted tools may be used for drafting, organisation, and consistency checks. The site operator remains responsible for publication, revision, and removal decisions.

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