PanicStation.org
UK USA
uk Personal safety & immediate danger someone asking where i live • repeatedly asking my address • where are you staying question • won’t accept vague answer • pressured for location details • unwanted questions about home • stranger asking my address • persistent personal questions • feels like stalking or harassment • coercive questions in public • hotel stay location privacy • i feel unsafe sharing address • someone won’t take no • personal safety boundary script • worried about being followed • location sharing risk • doxxing fear • unwanted contact escalation • safety in social settings

What to do if…
someone is repeatedly asking where you live or where you are staying and will not accept a vague answer

Short answer

Do not give them your address or accommodation details. End the conversation and move to a safer, public, staffed place; get someone else involved (friend, colleague, venue staff). If you feel in immediate danger, call 999.

Do not do these things

  • Do not “compromise” by giving partial details (street name, nearby landmark, hotel name, room/floor, where you’re headed next).
  • Do not let them walk you home, to your car, or to your accommodation “to be nice”.
  • Do not argue, explain, or try to convince them — keep it brief and leave.
  • Do not accept a lift, share a taxi, or go into a private space with them to “end the awkwardness”.
  • Do not reveal information from your phone screen (maps, booking emails, address autofill).
  • Do not post your live location, check-ins, or identifiable background photos while this is unfolding.

What to do now

  1. Name the boundary once, then stop negotiating.
    Use a simple line and repeat it once: “I’m not sharing that.” / “I don’t give out my address.” Then: “I’m going now.” (And go.)
  2. Move to a safer, staffed place immediately.
    Step away towards a bar/reception/front desk, security desk, or any busy shop/venue with employees. If you’re outside, go back inside somewhere staffed.
  3. Bring in a third party right away.
    • If you’re with someone: quietly say “I need help—stay with me,” and position yourselves so you are not alone with the person.
    • If you’re alone: tell staff plainly: “This person won’t stop asking where I live. I need help getting away safely.” Ask staff/security to stay with you while you leave.
  4. If you’re staying in a hotel or similar, set a privacy note now.
    Ask reception (in person or by phone) to add a note not to confirm your stay or share your room number to anyone who asks, and ask what they can do about visitors/calls. (Policies vary, but most can record a privacy preference.)
  5. Create a “safe exit” that doesn’t reveal your destination.
    Leave with staff, a friend, or in a way that doesn’t show where you’re going. If you need a taxi, arrange it from inside and avoid waiting alone outside.
  6. Record what happened while it’s fresh.
    Save messages/call logs if relevant. Write a quick note with time/date/location, what was asked, and anything identifying (appearance, name used, vehicle). This helps if it continues.
  7. If it feels like harassment/stalking or it’s escalating, use official routes.
    • Emergency / immediate danger: call 999.
    • Not an emergency: call 101, go to a police station, or report via your local police force’s online reporting.
    • If you want specialist safety advice about ongoing unwanted contact, you can contact the National Stalking Helpline (Suzy Lamplugh Trust).

What can wait

  • You do not have to decide right now whether this is “serious enough” or whether to make a formal complaint — focus on safety and distance first.
  • You do not need to gather perfect “evidence” before getting help; saving what you already have is enough for now.
  • You can decide later whether to block/report on platforms, change routines, or seek further support.

Important reassurance

It’s normal to feel pressured to answer personal questions to avoid awkwardness or conflict. Someone who will not accept a vague answer is crossing a boundary — protecting your address and accommodation is a reasonable safety step.

Scope note

This is first-steps guidance for the next minutes to hours. If the behaviour continues (in person or online), you may need additional help and consistent documentation.

Important note

This guide is general information, not legal advice. If you feel unsafe or threatened, prioritise getting to a safer place and contacting police. In an emergency, call 999.

Additional Resources
Support us