PanicStation.org
UK USA
uk Sexual violence & highly sensitive situations someone keeps showing up • turns up where i go • keeps appearing in public • unwanted sexual comments • sexual remarks in public • public sexual harassment • repeated unwanted contact • same person keeps appearing • follows me to places • waits near places i go • makes comments about my body • harassment in public spaces • stalking in public • unwanted attention outside • person keeps finding me • unsafe on my routine • scared to go out • repeated public encounters

What to do if…
someone keeps turning up at places you go and making sexual comments in public

Short answer

Treat this as a safety issue, not something you have to manage alone. At the earliest safe pause, tell one trusted person, write down what has been happening, and report it to police if it is repeated or is making you feel scared, distressed, or unsafe.

Do not do these things

  • Do not keep testing whether it is “serious enough” before getting help.
  • Do not agree to meet them privately to “clear it up”.
  • Do not post about them publicly while you are still trying to make yourself safer.
  • Do not delete messages, call logs, photos, or notes you already have.
  • Do not force yourself to keep the same routine just to prove you are not scared.
  • Do not feel you have to confront them on your own, especially in a quiet place.

What to do now

  1. Get to a safer pause. Go somewhere staffed or populated if you can, such as a shop, reception desk, library, café, workplace front desk, or transport office, and stay near other people while you decide your next step.

  2. Tell one person exactly what is happening. Use plain words: that the same person has been turning up at places you go and making sexual comments in public. Ask them to stay with you, walk with you, meet you after work or class, or be your check-in contact for the next few days.

  3. Start a simple incident log today. For each time, note the date, time, place, what they said or did, whether they seemed to be waiting for you or appeared unexpectedly, who saw it, and how it affected you. If there are messages, calls, photos, CCTV possibilities, or witnesses, note that too.

  4. If you are in immediate danger, think they are nearby waiting, or feel you may be followed right now, call 999. If it is not an emergency, report it to police on 101 or online. Repeated unwanted behaviour that makes you feel scared, distressed, or threatened can be stalking or harassment, and a single incident can still be worth reporting if it has made you feel unsafe.

  5. Tell the place where this keeps happening. Ask a manager, security desk, workplace, college, gym, venue, or transport staff member to make an internal record and keep any relevant CCTV if available. Ask for the incident reference, report number, or the name of the person you spoke to.

  6. Reduce how easy you are to predict for the next few days. Change the exact time or route of regular journeys where you reasonably can, avoid leaving alone after a known activity, and arrange company for arrival and departure rather than trying to handle it quietly by yourself.

  7. If this is affecting work, study, housing, or daily safety, contact a stalking support service as well as — or before — reporting. The National Stalking Helpline and advocacy services listed through the Suzy Lamplugh Trust can help you think through immediate safety, what details to note, and how to describe the pattern when you report it.

What can wait

You do not need to decide today whether to make a formal complaint, seek a long-term legal outcome, or explain the whole history perfectly. You also do not need to decide right now whether to keep every routine, stay socially active, or tell everyone in your life.

Important reassurance

Feeling shaken, doubtful, embarrassed, or worried about “making a fuss” is common in this situation. Repeated public sexual comments and turning up where you go can be frightening and disruptive even if nobody else seems to grasp the pattern immediately.

Scope note

This is first steps only, focused on immediate safety, support, and preserving options. Later decisions may need specialist help.

Important note

This is general information, not personal legal or clinical advice. If you may want to report later, keeping notes and not deleting existing evidence can help, but your safety matters more than collecting more. If a child is involved, or you think the behaviour is escalating quickly, contact police urgently.

Additional Resources
Support us