What to do if…
someone pressures you to leave a public place or go somewhere private with them
Short answer
Stay in the public, staffed area and do not go somewhere private merely to end the pressure. Move closer to staff, security or other people, and call 999 if you believe you or someone else is in immediate danger or a crime is in progress.
Do not do these things
- Do not leave with them merely to avoid embarrassment, awkwardness or an argument.
- Do not accept a lift from them if you feel unsafe.
- Do not enter their car or go into a side street, stairwell, room, home or other isolated place.
- Do not let them hold your phone, keys, bag, drink or travel card.
- Do not give a long explanation if that keeps you engaged with them.
- Do not let their familiarity, persistence or anger override your decision to remain in public.
What to do now
- Move towards staff, security, a reception desk, a cashier, a transport worker or a group of people. Stay where others can see and hear you.
- Use a short refusal if speaking feels safe: “No. I am staying here.” You do not need to debate or justify your decision.
- Tell a specific person what is happening. Say: “I do not want to leave with this person. Please stay with me and get security or call the police if needed.”
- Ask venue or transport staff whether you can wait beside them, move into a staffed area or receive help reaching transport that you arrange yourself.
- Call someone you trust. Tell them where you are, share your location if it is safe to do so, and ask them to come to you or remain on the phone.
- Arrange your own route away from the public place, such as collection by a trusted person, public transport from a staffed area or a licensed taxi or private-hire vehicle booked by you.
- Call 999 if the person threatens you, grabs you, prevents you from moving towards safety, follows you as you try to get away or otherwise places you in immediate danger.
- If you need urgent police help but cannot speak, dial 999, listen to the operator and respond by coughing or tapping if you can. If prompted, press 55 to be put through to the police.
- If refusing them directly may increase the danger, skip the conversation and move towards staff, other people or emergency help.
What can wait
A non-emergency report, writing a detailed account, confronting the person, deciding whether to remain in contact and explaining the incident to others can wait until you are safe and supported. You do not need to decide what label applies to the behaviour before asking for help.
Important reassurance
You can remain in public, change your mind and seek help. Pressure from a date, friend, colleague, acquaintance or stranger does not require you to go somewhere private, even if you previously agreed or they accuse you of overreacting.
Scope note
This guide covers immediate steps for reaching a safer pause. Later decisions about reporting, ongoing contact or repeated behaviour may require help from the police, a victim-support service or another appropriate professional.
Important note
This is general information, not legal advice or personalised security advice. Follow instructions from emergency services, police, security staff or venue staff who are responding at the scene.
Additional Resources
About this guide
This guide was produced and is maintained by PanicStation.org using its published editorial process. Official and specialist sources are checked where relevant, and AI-assisted tools may be used for drafting, organisation, and consistency checks. The site operator remains responsible for publication, revision, and removal decisions.