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uk Sexual violence & highly sensitive situations condom removed without consent • protection not used as agreed • condom slipped off without knowing • lied about using a condom • stealthing • unprotected sex without consent • consent was violated during sex • worried about pregnancy after sex • emergency contraception after sex • worried about sti exposure • need sexual assault support • unsure if this counts as assault • feel shocked after sex • pressured into sex without protection • afraid to confront partner • want help but not sure reporting • want medical help after sex • partner removed condom

What to do if…
you think protection was removed or not used as agreed during sex

Short answer

Get yourself somewhere you feel physically safe, then contact a Sexual Assault Referral Centre (SARC) or NHS 111 for urgent, confidential help (including emergency contraception, STI care, and support). You do not have to decide about reporting to police right now.

Do not do these things

  • Do not force yourself to “work out what it was” before getting help—support and medical care are still available even if you’re unsure.
  • Do not confront or negotiate with the other person while you feel shaken or unsafe (especially in person).
  • Do not blame yourself or try to “prove” anything to yourself by replaying details—write things down later if you want.
  • Do not delay time-sensitive medical options (like emergency contraception) while you decide what to do socially or legally.
  • Do not share identifying details widely or on social media while you’re distressed.

What to do now

  1. Get to a safer pause. If you’re with the person and feel uneasy, create space: go to the bathroom, call a friend, step outside, or leave. If you’re in immediate danger, call 999.
  2. Choose a confidential support route (you can do this without police). Pick the one that feels most doable:
    • A Sexual Assault Referral Centre (SARC) can offer confidential medical care and support, and talk through options at your pace.
    • Rape Crisis England & Wales 24/7 Support Line: 0808 500 2222 (phone or online chat).
    • NHS 111 can give urgent health advice and help direct you to local sexual health/SARC services.
  3. Ask about pregnancy prevention now (time-sensitive). Tell the clinician/pharmacist you’re concerned contraception was not used as agreed. They can discuss emergency contraception options, including the emergency pill and the copper IUD (usually within 5 days / 120 hours after unprotected sex; sometimes it may still be an option depending on where you are in your cycle—ask urgently).
  4. Ask about STI care and HIV prevention (time-sensitive). A SARC or sexual health clinic can arrange STI testing and, if relevant, discuss medications that may reduce HIV risk if started quickly after exposure.
  5. Choose one supportive person to contact. If possible, message or call someone you trust with a simple ask: “Can you stay on the phone with me?” or “Can you come sit with me?”
  6. If you may want formal options later: if it feels doable, avoid washing your body or disposing of items until you’ve spoken to a SARC. If you already have washed/changed, you can still get care and support.

What can wait

  • You do not need to decide right now whether to report to police, tell friends/family, or confront the other person.
  • You do not need to label what happened with a specific legal term to deserve support.
  • You can decide later whether you want counselling, a statement, or any longer process—today is about immediate safety and health.

Important reassurance

Many people freeze, comply, or feel confused in moments where consent is violated—those responses are common and not your fault. Feeling shaky, numb, angry, or unsure is a normal reaction to something that crossed your boundaries.

Scope note

These are first steps to stabilise and reduce harm (safety, urgent health options, immediate support). Anything beyond that—reporting, ongoing support, or legal advice—can come later, with specialist help if you want it.

Important note

This is general information, not medical, legal, or forensic advice. If you feel in immediate danger call 999. If you are not in immediate danger but want police help, you can contact them via 101.

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