PanicStation.org
UK USA
uk Sexual violence & highly sensitive situations child asked for nudes • adult asking child photos • adult offering gifts online • online grooming child • private video call request • sexual messages to child • stranger asking child pictures • adult wants private photos • child says someone online • grooming for gifts • someone buying child presents • adult requesting explicit images • child pressured online • unsafe online contact child • child asked for secret photos • adult asking for webcam • child offered money or gifts • online sexual exploitation child • suspicious adult chat child • child worried about messages

What to do if…
your child says an adult is asking for private photos or video calls and offering gifts in return

Short answer

Treat this as a child-safety issue, not a discipline issue. Stay calm, stop the contact if you can do so safely, and get specialist help from CEOP, police, or the NSPCC rather than trying to handle it alone.

Do not do these things

  • Do not blame, shame, or punish your child for telling you.
  • Do not tell your child to keep talking to the adult to “get proof.”
  • Do not delete messages, usernames, screenshots, gifts, payment records, or account details if they still exist.
  • Do not contact or threaten the adult yourself.
  • Do not force your child to repeat everything over and over to different people if it can be avoided.
  • Do not promise absolute secrecy; explain that you may need to involve adults whose job is to help keep children safe.

What to do now

  1. Move to a calmer, private space with your child and thank them for telling you. Use simple language such as: “You are not in trouble. I’m glad you told me. This is not your fault.”
  2. End the contact in the safest immediate way available. That usually means helping your child stop replying, leave the chat, block the account, and turn off location sharing or live video access on the app they were using.
  3. Keep what is already there without spreading it further. Save screenshots of usernames, profiles, messages, payment offers, gift promises, video-call requests, and dates if you can do that without making your child keep looking at the content.
  4. Check whether any image or video was already sent, any live call happened, any gifts or money changed hands, or whether the adult may know your child’s school, address, phone number, or routine. This helps you decide who needs to be told now.
  5. Report it. In the UK, CEOP is a specialist reporting route if you are concerned your child is being sexually abused or groomed online. If you need police help instead, report to the police on 101 or online through your local police service. Use 999 if there is immediate danger or an in-person meeting may happen soon.
  6. Contact the NSPCC Helpline for support as a parent or carer if you need help deciding what to say or do next. Your child can also contact Childline directly for confidential support.
  7. If an image or video of your child may already be online, use Childline and IWF’s Report Remove for under-18s to try to get sexual images of a young person removed from the internet.
  8. Tell only the people who need to know right now. If the adult may be connected to school, sport, tuition, religion, transport, or another organised setting, tell the school’s designated safeguarding lead or, in another setting, the safeguarding lead, head, or child-protection contact the same day.
  9. Stay physically and digitally close for a while. Check privacy settings together, look for other accounts the adult used, and make sure your child is not dealing with new messages, threats, or gift offers alone tonight.

What can wait

You do not need to decide today how to handle every app, every friendship, or every long-term online rule. You also do not need to force a full written timeline from your child right now. The urgent part is safety, stopping contact, preserving what already exists, and getting the right support involved.

Important reassurance

Children are often targeted through secrecy, praise, pressure, gifts, or attention. Freezing, going along with it, replying, hiding it, or feeling embarrassed are common reactions. Telling you was an important protective step.

Scope note

This is first steps only for a highly sensitive situation. Later decisions about school, devices, reporting, and emotional support may need specialist help.

Important note

This is general information, not legal, police, or therapeutic advice. If you think there is any immediate risk of contact in person, immediate harm, or ongoing coercion, contact emergency services now.

Additional Resources
Support us