What to do if…
a partner or family member becomes violent and blocks you from leaving
Short answer
At the earliest safe pause, call 911 and give your location, then say that a violent partner or family member is blocking you from leaving. If you cannot safely call, try texting 911 or use another safe way to alert someone who can call.
Do not do these things
- Do not try to settle the argument or prove your point while the violence is active.
- Do not announce that you are calling for help or planning to leave if that may increase the danger.
- Do not move closer to the person, weapons, or a room with no clear exit if a safer option is available.
- Do not stop to collect belongings, documents, medication, or pets while you are in immediate danger.
- Do not ask a child or another dependent to physically intervene.
- Do not assume that calls, messages, searches, or browser activity are private if the person monitors your devices.
- Do not delay contacting emergency services because you are unsure whether the situation is serious enough.
What to do now
- Call 911 when you can do so safely. Give your location and say that the person is violent and preventing you from leaving. Tell the call-taker about injuries, weapons, children, or anyone else at risk, and follow their instructions.
- If you cannot safely make a voice call, try texting 911 with your location and a brief description of the emergency. If you receive a bounce-back saying text-to-911 is unavailable, use any other safe way to alert a neighbor, nearby person, building staff member, or trusted contact and ask them to call 911.
- If a safer route becomes available, move toward a clear exit or a place where other people can see or hear you. Avoid moving toward weapons or becoming trapped in a room with only one exit.
- Keep anything you say to the violent person brief and neutral if possible. Focus on reducing immediate escalation rather than explaining, threatening consequences, or discussing the relationship.
- If children or other dependents are present, direct them away from the violence if they can move safely. They may call 911 or go to a trusted nearby adult, but they should not approach or physically intervene with the violent person.
- Once you are out, go to a neighbor, staffed public place, police or fire station, or trusted person. Do not return alone while the person may still be violent.
- Tell 911 responders about any injuries, breathing problems, pressure placed on your neck, loss of consciousness, or blows to your head. Ask for medical help when you need it.
- After the immediate danger has passed and it is safe to use your device, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline by calling 800-799-7233, texting START to 88788, or using its online chat. An advocate can discuss immediate local support and safety options without requiring you to make a long-term decision.
What can wait
You do not need to decide now whether to end the relationship, move permanently, collect every belonging, confront the person, or take further legal action. Evidence gathering, housing arrangements, work or school explanations, and longer-term safety planning can wait until you are physically safer and have support.
Important reassurance
The violence and the decision to block you from leaving are not your fault. You do not need to calm the person perfectly or prove what happened before seeking emergency help.
Scope note
This guide covers the earliest safety steps during and immediately after the incident. Later decisions about housing, children, medical follow-up, legal options, and ongoing safety may require help from a domestic violence advocate or another qualified professional.
Important note
This is general safety information, not legal, medical, therapeutic, or other professional advice. Emergency conditions and available services vary by location; follow instructions from 911 responders and qualified local professionals.
Additional Resources
About this guide
This guide was produced and is maintained by PanicStation.org using its published editorial process. Official and specialist sources are checked where relevant, and AI-assisted tools may be used for drafting, organisation, and consistency checks. The site operator remains responsible for publication, revision, and removal decisions.