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us Sexual violence & highly sensitive situations sexual favours for opportunity • quid pro quo harassment • authority figure coercion • boss hints for sex • manager demands sexual favour • supervisor pressures for sex • professor suggests sex for grades • title ix concerns • landlord suggests sex for housing • internship opportunity coercion • promotion tied to sex • power imbalance sexual request • afraid to refuse • retaliation fear • unwanted sexual proposition • pressured meeting alone • preserve messages • document what happened • confidential hotline support • workplace harassment reporting

What to do if…
someone in a position of authority hints you must provide sexual favours for an opportunity

Short answer

Get to a safe pause and stop any private one-to-one contact with them for now. Keep your options open by saving what happened and getting support you can trust.

Do not do these things

  • Don’t say yes or “play along” to protect the opportunity if you don’t want to.
  • Don’t meet them alone in a private place (office after hours, car, hotel room, apartment, “quick off-site talk”).
  • Don’t delete texts/DMs/emails, calendar invites, or notes.
  • Don’t confront them alone if you feel unsafe.
  • Don’t make irreversible moves (quit, withdraw from a program, move out) right now—pause and get support first.

What to do now

  1. End the interaction and create distance. Use a simple exit line (“I have to go,” “Please email me details,” “I’m not available for that”) and move to a public/safer space.
  2. Move communication to writing. If you must respond, keep it short and professional and shift to email/text. Avoid private calls or closed-door meetings.
  3. Make a contemporaneous record. Write down: date/time, location, what was said (as close as you can recall), what the opportunity was, any implied threat/retaliation, and anyone nearby. Store it somewhere you control.
  4. Preserve existing evidence. Save screenshots/exports of messages, emails, voicemails, meeting invites, or relevant documents. If you may want to report later, keep originals and avoid editing them.
  5. Tell one safe person today. Choose someone supportive (friend/family). If this is tied to work/school/housing and you want to loop in an office, consider starting with the least risky option for you—and ask about confidentiality and reporting obligations before sharing identifying details.
  6. Use specialist support without committing to a report. A hotline/advocacy service can help you think through safety and options. If you want confidentiality, ask directly: “Are you a confidential resource?” before you share names or identifying details.
  7. If you’re being threatened or feel in immediate danger, prioritize safety. Get somewhere safer and call 911.

What can wait

  • You do not have to decide right now whether to file a complaint, report to police, or take legal action.
  • You do not need to have “perfect proof” or the perfect words before you reach out for help.
  • You do not have to confront the person or keep communicating to “confirm” what they meant.

Important reassurance

When someone has power over your job, grades, housing, or access, it can scramble your ability to respond. Feeling frozen, confused, polite, or conflicted is common—and it doesn’t mean you consented or that you caused it. You deserve support and safety.

Scope note

This is first-steps-only guidance to stabilize the situation, reduce immediate risk, and preserve your choices. Formal reporting routes (workplace, campus, housing, government agencies) can be considered later with support.

Important note

This guide is general information, not legal or medical advice. If you are in immediate danger, call 911. For tailored help, consider confidential crisis support and independent advice relevant to your situation (workplace, campus, housing).

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