What to do if…
you need to update your child’s emergency contacts and pick-up list after a death

What to do now

1. Make a quick “who might call?” list.
   Start with whoever supervises the child today or this week: school, aftercare, daycare, babysitter, transportation, clubs, sports, camps, pediatrician, dentist, and any program that may need pick-up authorization.

2. Call the school, daycare, or current supervisor and ask for the exact update process.
   Say: “An emergency contact on file has died. I need to update emergency contacts and authorized pick-up today.”
   Ask them to:

   • remove the deceased contact
   • add at least one or two backup contacts, if the form allows
   • update the authorized pick-up or release list
   • update any pick-up password or code word, if used
   • confirm when the change is active for front desk, classroom, bus, aftercare, and security staff

3. Give each new contact’s details in one clear block.
   Include the adult’s full name, relationship to the child, cell number, alternate number, and how quickly they can arrive. If someone can answer calls but cannot pick up the child, say that clearly.

4. If the child’s main caregiver changed suddenly, ask what they need for safe release today.
   Ask whether they need photo ID, written authorization, a portal update, or a copy of custody or guardianship paperwork if applicable. If you do not have paperwork yet, ask what temporary process they can use, such as ID plus a same-day signed release form.

5. If there is divorce, separation, custody, or protection-order complexity, give the school the document you already have.
   Covered schools generally give FERPA rights to either parent unless the school has evidence of a court order, state law, or legally binding document that specifically changes those rights. Give the most current copy you have and ask the office to confirm how staff will handle calls, records access, pick-up, and release.

6. Update medical contacts with the pediatrician and any regular specialist.
   Call the office and say: “A listed emergency contact has died, and I need the chart updated.” Ask what they need to update the responsible adult, emergency contacts, and anyone allowed to receive calls. A parent or guardian is generally treated as a minor child’s personal representative under HIPAA, but exceptions and state law can affect what the office may update or share.

7. Use one copy-paste contact block to reduce mistakes.
   Keep one note you reuse everywhere: child’s full name, date of birth, your number, backup contacts, authorized pick-up names, and any pick-up password or code word. Read it back to the office before ending the call.

8. Tell the new backup adults what to expect.
   Send them the child’s school or daycare name, main office number, pick-up location, ID requirement, and any code word they are allowed to use. Ask them to keep their phone on today.